After two weeks of seemingly endless predictions regarding what would occur during virtually every minute of the Super Bowl LII broadcast, last night answered which team would win, what Justin Timberlake would sing, and whose commercials would be good, bad, and ugly.
Winner? The Eagles in a 41-33 shootout whose 1,152 offensive yards were the most of any NFL game ever.
JT’s performance? Some classics like “Rock Your Body” and “Sexy Back” mixed with a Prince tribute accompanied by a projection of Prince.
As for the Super Bowl commercials, the subjective labels of best, worst, and ugliest are best left to the eye of the beholder, so here’s an objective recap of all that aired from kickoff to 0:00 on Sunday night:
BLOCK | BRAND | CATEGORY | IN A NUTSHELL |
1 | Toyota | Auto | Olympic skier proves anything is possible. |
Sprint | Tech | Robots make fun of guy for using Verizon. | |
2 | Solo: Star Wars | Content | Solo: Stars Wars coming this summer. |
Turkish Airlines | Travel | Dr. Oz says widen your world. | |
Rise (NBC Show) | Content | NBC’s Rise is coming | |
3 | Budweiser | Food/Bev | Medieval Dilly Dilly. |
Mars | Food/Bev | Danny Devito likes M & Ms. | |
Winter Olympics | Content | The Winter Olympics are coming. | |
4 | Dodge | Auto | Ram trucks will get Vikings to the Super Bowl, even if The Vikings aren’t in it. |
Wendy’s | Food/Bev | Wendy’s burgers are made fresh and killin’ it. | |
The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon | Content | Jimmy is on tonight after the game and This is Us so you’ll probably be asleep and miss him. | |
5 | Hulu’s Castle Rock | Content | Hulu has a new show. |
Sketchers | Apparel | Sketchers are, as always, great for Howie Long’s feet. | |
Heroes Arena | Gaming | Download and play a video game with friends. | |
Winter Olympics | Content | The Winter Olympics are still coming. | |
6 | Doritos | Food/Bev | Busta-rapping Peter Dinklage likes Doritos’ new spicy chips. |
Mountain Dew | Food/Bev | And Missy-rapping Morgan Freeman likes new Mountain Dew Ice. | |
Tide | Home | Clean clothes mean it’s a Tide ad. | |
Skyscraper | Content | The Rock is a badass in yet another movie. | |
7 | Budweiser | Food/Bev | The Bud Knight kind of saves the day. |
E Trade | Finance | An E Trade retirement account will keep you from working at 85. | |
Mission Impossible Fallout | Content | Tom Cruise is still jumping all over the place. | |
Olympics (NBC) | Content | Winter Olympics will have figure skating! | |
This is Us (NBC) | Content | Set your DVRs because the This is Us fire happens tonight! | |
8 | Rocket Mortgage | Finance | Quicken makes mortgages simple. |
Avocados from Mexico | Food/Bev | Avocados taste great on lots of things. | |
The Cloverfield Paradox (Netflix) | Content | New Netflix sci-fi series coming. | |
9 | Diet Coke Twisted Mango | Food/Bev | Coke’s new diet soda makes you dance weird. |
Jeep | Auto | Jeep takes you past where the road ends. | |
Tide | Home | Old Spice guy does Tide ad. | |
WeatherTech | Auto | WeatherTech makes stuff in America. | |
10 | Pringles | Food/Bev | Pringles lets you stack flavors to make new ones. |
Febreeze | Home | Febreeze makes your feet not stink | |
Michelob Ultra | Food/Bev | Michelob Ultra is for everyone, not just Chris Pratt | |
11 | BLACKOUT | NA | Thought maybe this was one of those grab-your-attention-then-serve-you-an-ad ads, but nope. |
12 | SquareSpace | Tech | Keanu Reeves likes SquareSpace |
Dodge | Auto | Ram trucks, with MLK narration, are built to serve | |
13 | Australia | Travel | You can have a great time in Australia even if you’re not the next Crocodile Dundee. |
TurboTax | Finance | TurboTax makes taxes simple. | |
Persil | Home | Persil delivers premium clean. | |
Good Girls (NBC) | Content | Good Girls coming soon. | |
14 | NFL | Content | There’s no offseason. |
News 4 (NBC Local Affiliate) | Content | Local NBC news channel works for you. | |
Yellowtail Wine | Food/Bev | Kangaroos love Yellowtail. | |
Nationwide Auto (Local) | Auto | You should buy cars from a local dealer. | |
Dominion Energy | Home | Local energy company powers the future. | |
NFL | Content | Eli Manning talks about TD dance. | |
15 | Toyota | Auto | Toyota takes religious leaders of all sorts to the football game. |
Olympics (NBC) | Content | Lindsey Vonn is a badass. | |
16 | Unsolved (USA TV show) | Content | A show about Tupac’s murder coming. |
Pepsi | Food/Bev | Jimmy Fallon introduces JT from big NYC Pepsi sign. | |
17 | Jack Ryan (Amazon Prime show) | Content | Jim from The Office is a hero in a new Amazon series. |
Verizon | Tech | Verizon helps first responders save lives. | |
18 | The Voice (NBC show) | Content | The Voice is coming later this month. |
Xfinity | Content | Xfinity will help you experience the Winter Olympics. | |
Royal Farms (Local) | Food/Bev | Ravens’ kicker sings opera to promote convenience store coffee. | |
Long Roofing (Local) | Home | A new roof will protect you from winter. | |
NFL | Content | Eli is still plotting a TD dance. | |
19 | Lexus | Auto | New Lexus even works for superheroes. |
Tide | Home | Even though there’s a Clydesdale it’s still a Tide ad. | |
Budweiser | Food/Bev | Budweiser bottled and donated water to California | |
Turbo Tax | Finance | Turbo Tax gets taxes done. | |
20 | Jeep | Auto | Jeeps let Jeff Goldblum (and you) chase dinosaurs. |
Westworld (HBO Show) | Content | Westworld Season 2 is coming soon. | |
Turbo Tax | Finance | Turbo Tax makes taxes easy. | |
21 | Kia | Auto | Steven Tyler gets younger by driving backwards on a track. |
Blacture | Content | There’s a new website for black people only. | |
NFL | Content | Eli still thinking about TD dances. | |
NBC | Content | Winter Olympics are still coming. | |
22 | Avengers | Content | Another Avengers movie is coming. |
T Mobile | Tech | We should all be equal! | |
Jesus Christ Superstar (NBC Live Musical) | Content | John Legend is going to star in this musical. | |
23 | Toyota | Auto | Toyota believes anything is possible. |
Wix | Tech | You can create a stunning episode with Wix | |
Kraft | Food/Bev | Kraft helps you celebrate with your family | |
Today Show (NBC) | Content | Today Show is still good | |
24 | NFL | Content | Eli and OBJ are ready for TD dances next season. |
Raytheon | Tech | Technology makes the world a safer place. | |
Chevron | Tech | Chevron drones help keep things moving. | |
Cyprus Air (Local Gas Fireplaces) | Home | Local fireplace company with Trump impersonator and Redskins QB Kirk Cousins. | |
25 | Monster | Tech | Monster’s wireless headphones are changing the game. |
Michelob Ultra | Food/Bev | Chris Pratt has fun because he drinks Michelob Ultra | |
Groupon | E-Commerce | Buying Groupons supports local businesses. | |
26 | Amazon alexa | Home | Lots of celebs answer people’s alexa requests. |
27 | Coca-Cola | Food/Bev | There’s a Coke for me and a Coke for you. |
Universal Parks & Resorts | Travel | Payton Manning enjoys Universal’s offseason. | |
Telemundo | Content | Telemundo has lots of soccer to watch. | |
28 | Hyundai | Auto | Cancer survivors thank Hyundai buyers. |
Olympics (NBC) | Content | Winter Olympics are still coming. | |
29 | Stella Artois | Food/Bev | Matt Damon is still helping give people water through Stella Artois chalice glasses. |
Jeep | Auto | Jeeps can drive through water. | |
Tide | Home | Tide is just the best. | |
This is Us (NBC) | Content | All of your This is Us questions will be answered after the game. |
And, as if that weren’t enough, a categorical breakdown of the 92 Super Bowl ads:
My personal takeaway from the Super Bowl? Content – or should I say marketing one’s own content through one’s own network – is king, and NBC really hopes American viewers are ready to watch athletes compete on snow and ice.
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